Eva Longoria forced herself not to question her attractiveness or intelligence after her ex-husband cheated.
The actress and basketball star Tony Parker split in 2010 after she discovered he had been texting another woman during their marriage.
They are now divorced and although Eva found the break-up hard, she refused to blame herself for the situation.
"I am so secure in who I am. I really am! And I'm not conceited. I just think, 'Wow, OK, that's the life you want to live.' It wasn't about who he chose," she said while talking to Amanda de Cadenet for TV show The Conversation.
"I mean, I had moments [where I wondered], 'Am I not sexy enough? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not smart enough?' But in so many of those questions, I immediately stopped and said, 'No, don't start doing that.' Because you can get stuck in that cycle and you can carry on to other things."
Eva spoke to Tony at length about why he had contacted the other woman. She felt it was important for her to understand why the marriage broke down.
"Even having the conversation, I really wanted to provide a pillow for him to say and express 'the why.' Because I really wanted to know why," she explained.
"I don't want to judge you. I'm not going to judge you. I'm not going to be mad in this moment. I'll be mad later.
"People say, 'What grace!' And it wasn't that. I really wanted to know, and if you genuinely want to get something out of somebody, you have to not judge."
The 37-year-old star says hearing the intricacies of the text messages helped her to come to terms with Tony's actions. However, it didn't make dealing with the break-up any easier.
Eva is now thought to be dating Eduardo Cruz despite a brief split this year. She is happy and content and has no plans to change her life at the moment.
"I'm in a transitional state where I have no rules and I have no boundaries, and I don't really want to put those back up," she said.
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